Trip To Europe « Result #5 on Mar 21, 2009, 12:13am »
A beautiful young New York woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. But just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young sailor stopped her.
"You have so much to live for," said the sailor. "Look, I¡¯m off to Europe tomorrow and I can stow you away on my ship. I¡¯ll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy."
With nothing to lose, combined with the fact that she had always wanted to go to Europe, the woman accepted. That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he would bring her three sandwiches and make love to her until dawn.
Three weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection.
"What are you doing here?" asked the captain.
"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she replied. "He brings me food and I get a free trip to Europe. Plus he¡¯s screwing me."
"He certainly is," replied the captain. "This is the Staten Island Ferry".
A Short Holiday « Result #6 on Mar 20, 2009, 11:44pm »
Alan worked in an office in the city. He worked very hard and really looked forward to his holidays.
¡¡¡¡He usually went to the seaside, but one year he saw an ad in a newspaper "Enjoy country life. Spend a few weeks at Willow Farm. Good food, fresh air, horse riding, walking, fishing. Reasonable prices ."
¡¡¡¡" This sounds like a good idea." he thought, " I' 11 spend a month at Willow Farm. I'll enjoy horse riding, walking and fishing. They'll make a change from sitting by the seaside.
¡¡¡¡Four days later he returned home.
¡¡¡¡"What' s wrong with Willow Farm ?" his friend asked him. " Didn't you enjoy country life ?"
¡¡¡¡"Country life was fine," Alan said." But there was another problem.
¡¡¡¡"Oh, what?"
¡¡¡¡Well, the first day I was there a sheep died, and we had roast lamb for dinner.
¡¡¡¡“Fresh meat is the best.”_"I know, but on the second day a cow died, and we had roast beef for dinner. "
¡¡¡¡"Lucky you!"
¡¡¡¡"You don't understand," Alan said." On the third day a pig died and we had roast pork for dinner."
¡¡¡¡" A different roast every day." Jack exclaimed.
¡¡¡¡"Let me finish," Alan said." On the fourth day the farmer died and I didn't dare stay for dinner!"
The Easter Bunny « Result #7 on Mar 9, 2009, 10:37pm »
When I was a little girl, every Sunday my family of six would put on their best clothes and go to Sunday School and then church. The kids in elementary school would all meet together to sing songs, and then later divide into groups based on their ages.
One Easter Sunday,wow power leveling all the kids arrived with big eyes and big stories about what the Easter Bunny had brought. While all of the kids shared their stories with delight, one young boy, whom I will call Bobby, sat sullenly. One of the teachers, noticing this, said to him, wow gold "And what did the Easter Bunny bring you?" He replied, "My mom locked the door on accident so the Easter Bunny couldn't get inside."
This sounded like a reasonable idea to all of us kids,wow power leveling so we kept on going with the stories. My mom knew the true story, though. Bobby's mom was a single parent, and she suspected that they just couldn't afford the Easter Bunny.
After Sunday School was over, everyone went off to church. When my dad came to meet us my mom announced that we were going home instead. At home, she explained that to make Bobby feel better, we were going to pretend to be the Easter Bunny and make a basket of goodies for him and leave it at church. We all donated some of our candies to the basket, and headed back up to church. There,wow gold mom unzipped his coat, hung the basket over the hanger, and zipped up the coat and attached a note.
Dear Bobby, I'm sorry I missed your house last night.wow gold Happy Easter. Love, The Easter Bunny
Cissysbaby Ravenclaw 1st year/ moderator Wand: fairly slender but firm, 10",willow, phoenix feather Robes: Books: A Beginner's Guide to Potions Extra items: Supplies: Pet: Classes: [M:0][M:50][M:50] member is offline
there's NOTHING pure and simple about being evil...
Joined: May 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 321 Location: somewhere you can't find me... Karma: 1
Re: First Thing « Result #8 on Sept 12, 2008, 3:47pm »
We thought her dying whilst she slept and sleeping when she died...
John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt, His name is my name too... And when I go about, The people always shout, "There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt!" Na na na na na na na...
Cissysbaby Ravenclaw 1st year/ moderator Wand: fairly slender but firm, 10",willow, phoenix feather Robes: Books: A Beginner's Guide to Potions Extra items: Supplies: Pet: Classes: [M:0][M:50][M:50] member is offline
there's NOTHING pure and simple about being evil...
Joined: May 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 321 Location: somewhere you can't find me... Karma: 1
Re: Never In A Million years! « Result #9 on Sept 12, 2008, 3:46pm »
We thought her dying whilst she slept and sleeping when she died...
John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt, His name is my name too... And when I go about, The people always shout, "There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt!" Na na na na na na na...
Cissysbaby Ravenclaw 1st year/ moderator Wand: fairly slender but firm, 10",willow, phoenix feather Robes: Books: A Beginner's Guide to Potions Extra items: Supplies: Pet: Classes: [M:0][M:50][M:50] member is offline
there's NOTHING pure and simple about being evil...
Joined: May 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 321 Location: somewhere you can't find me... Karma: 1
Re: Who would win? « Result #10 on Sept 12, 2008, 3:44pm »
We thought her dying whilst she slept and sleeping when she died...
John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt, His name is my name too... And when I go about, The people always shout, "There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt!" Na na na na na na na...
Cissysbaby Ravenclaw 1st year/ moderator Wand: fairly slender but firm, 10",willow, phoenix feather Robes: Books: A Beginner's Guide to Potions Extra items: Supplies: Pet: Classes: [M:0][M:50][M:50] member is offline
there's NOTHING pure and simple about being evil...
Joined: May 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 321 Location: somewhere you can't find me... Karma: 1
Re: Post to 500(1) « Result #11 on Sept 12, 2008, 3:34pm »
We thought her dying whilst she slept and sleeping when she died...
John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt, His name is my name too... And when I go about, The people always shout, "There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt!" Na na na na na na na...
Cissysbaby Ravenclaw 1st year/ moderator Wand: fairly slender but firm, 10",willow, phoenix feather Robes: Books: A Beginner's Guide to Potions Extra items: Supplies: Pet: Classes: [M:0][M:50][M:50] member is offline
there's NOTHING pure and simple about being evil...
Joined: May 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 321 Location: somewhere you can't find me... Karma: 1
Re: word by word « Result #12 on Sept 12, 2008, 3:31pm »
Neville whined and wished incessantly for Draco's pink leopard
We thought her dying whilst she slept and sleeping when she died...
John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt, His name is my name too... And when I go about, The people always shout, "There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt!" Na na na na na na na...
Cissysbaby Ravenclaw 1st year/ moderator Wand: fairly slender but firm, 10",willow, phoenix feather Robes: Books: A Beginner's Guide to Potions Extra items: Supplies: Pet: Classes: [M:0][M:50][M:50] member is offline
there's NOTHING pure and simple about being evil...
Joined: May 2006 Gender: Female Posts: 321 Location: somewhere you can't find me... Karma: 1
Re: Abbriviations « Result #13 on Sept 12, 2008, 3:27pm »
Hairy Overweight Gaints Waddle After Ridiculously Tall Sidekicks
Yay.. Muhahahaha...!!!
JIGGERY-POKERY.
((it's a scientific term you know..))
« Last Edit: Sept 12, 2008, 3:29pm by Cissysbaby »
We thought her dying whilst she slept and sleeping when she died...
John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt, His name is my name too... And when I go about, The people always shout, "There goes John Jacob Jingleheimer-schmitt!" Na na na na na na na...
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